About two years ago, I had a 1-1/2 hour drive where I dreamed the whole time about playing the drums. (Sidenote: no idea how I had a 1-1/2 hour quiet car ride by myself where I could be lost in my own thoughts.) (Second sidenote: I have no musical talent whatsoever.) I imagined that playing the drums, hard core rock and roll drums, would just be so bad ass. I thought about taking up drum lessons, and then thrashing on them during jam sessions in my barn. Every song that came on the radio, I pictured me whaling on the drums to. I pictured Tommy Lee in his cage playing the drums while spinning in the air upside down in concert. I remembered loving Alex Van Halen’s drum solos during my numerous trips to Van Halen concerts. Their energy and concentration was just crazy! I loved it!
Did I take up the drums after that 1-1/2 hour drive by myself, no. Am I sad or incomplete? No.
I have dreamt of taking up dance lessons. I’ll admit, listening to Enrique Iglesias’ Bailando on the radio real loud gets me dreaming about learning some crazy Latin dances and cutting up a rug. Have I, no. Do I feel like I’m short changing myself? No.
When I’ve presented at a workshops, or in front of groups, I usually start with handing out name tags and asking everyone to write down their dream job on it. (This activity actually relates to my presentations, but that’s not my point here.) My point here is that I almost always write down farmer as my dream job. I have dreamt of being a farmer for a ridiculous amount of hours that can not be returned for more productive things. This is one dream that I’ve kinda gotten a taste of, living on an acre with 2 dogs, 3 cats and 4 chickens as well as my garden of many different fruits and vegetables has given me enough of a taste to be satisfied. I still dream of driving a tractor, and walking through my rows of crops, but I’m ok with what I have going on for now.
I love to dream, I think I’ve always been a dreamer. I’ve been able to get wrapped up in the what ifs for hours. Usually, it’s fun stuff, like drums and dancing. Other times, it may be dreaming of punching someone in the face. Sometimes I get caught up in dreaming about worst case scenarios (these I try and stop, I can get way to carried away and scared). The point is, I don’t necessarily end up doing the things that I dream about. Especially the punching someone in the face, that would not be good. (But honestly, who hasn’t thought one of those scenarios out!) I don’t feel like I’m short changing myself for not going after all of my dreams. I dream all the time, its different than a yearning, or a drive. If I dream about something long enough, that becomes important, and turns into a drive, I’ll go for it. But dreaming is different, it’s daily. I think that if we don’t dream, we don’t grow.
My kids asked me when I was a kid, what did I want to be when I grew up? I tell them a veterinarian.
They seem to slowly look around, and you can see the wheels turning: Stay at Home mom, Recreation Therapist, Substitute Teacher, Bookkeeping for our home business, Volunteer at more things than can be counted…..no veterinarian in there.
Then I get the question “Why didn’t you become a veterinarian?” And I explain it that as my life went on, I discovered new things, things that led me to new paths. Not lesser paths, different paths. I am fully grounded, fulfilled, and happy in the roles that have become my life. I’ve learned to adapt to changes. I’m not always graceful with it, but in the end I’m pretty good at making the most out of situations.
When we ask our kids what they want to be when they grow up, professions such as Marine Biologist, Teacher, Sports Statistician, trainer for Shamu the whale at Seaworld, and SF Giants Announcer have all been thrown around as ideas. A couple say they want to play professional sports. As an adult, I could easily look at the probability of one of my children being a professional athlete, and point out the small percentage of people who get the opportunity to play even at high school levels these days, let alone college, and then professionally. But my job isn’t to shoot down their dreams. I feel that once they stop dreaming, they may stop living what can be an incredible life. It’s up to them to decide where their lives will take them. If kids don’t dream, they are stifled, there is nothing to reach for. The reality of life will hit them sooner than they know it. I love watching them be kids, and seeing where they want their life to take them. I want my kids to keep dreaming to lead them to one of the many ‘right’ paths of their lives.
So, even as a “grown up”, I will continue to enjoy dreaming. If there are no dreams, where is hope? Someday, when a dream sticks with me and won’t let me go after a 1-1/2 hour drive, I’ll go and chase it as I have with so many!!! Dream big and dream often. Even though I’m not living my younger self’s dream of being a vet, I’m happy. And that’s what I dream for my kids.
Looking through my old ticket stubs had me dreaming of younger years where $20 for beer and a cab ride home from the concert was all the worries and needs in the world for that night!!!